Sorry for the delay. I was out enjoying the warm weather, way to much. Now that we’re back on track, please welcome this month’s guest host, Melanie Dickerson, Christy Award Finalist and author of The Merchant’s Daughter and The Healer’s Apprentice. You can connect with her on Facebook or her website. Here we go…

Show Don’t Tell is an oft-quoted rule for writers. But what does “Show Don’t Tell” mean?

There are several different nuances to this rule, but here’s a simple way of looking at it. For example, in your story it’s snowing. You could start your story by saying, “Snow was falling from the sky.” That’s telling, and it’s really pretty boring. To show your reader, to help them picture it, you could write, “Snow poured from the sky in huge flakes, blowing and swirling in a sheet of white so thick I almost couldn’t see the tree in our back yard.”

Now your reader can actually “see” what the snow looks like. Your reader, as if they were the character, is trying to see that tree in the back yard and can just barely make it out through the thick snow. Now you have created a setting for your reader. They are looking out a window staring at a snowstorm. But you didn’t tell them that. You showed them.

One way to “show don’t tell” is to write like your story is a movie unfolding before the reader’s eyes.

Set the stage. If you were putting on a play, and if it was set in a jungle, what would you do to let the audience know it was a jungle setting? You wouldn’t have an actor come onto the stage and say, “This play is set in a jungle. So use your imagination and pretend this is a jungle.” No. You would show the setting with props that look like tropical foliage, trees and bushes, vines and flowers.

It’s the same with your book. You could start your story with, “I was in the middle of the jungle, looking for monkeys.” Or you could start it with, “The strange hooting of a howler monkey filled my ears as I peered through the dense tropical foliage. The humidity caused my shirt to stick to my skin, and as I searched the treetops high overhead for a glimpse of the monkeys I could hear but could not see, I slapped at the strange insect that tried to land on my arm.”

Which version is more interesting?

It’s more interesting to start your story as if the reader is actually in the point of view (POV) of your character, experiencing the story, instead of just listening to someone tell a story. Let you reader experience the story through the character, as if they are in the character’s mind.

For instance, let the characters react to what is happening instead of stating what is happening. Example: I went out into the snow, but it made me cold, so a few minutes later I went back inside. That is telling.

Example: I stepped outside and the flakes landed on my cheeks and nose and eyelashes, over and over again, wetting my exposed skin. The wind blew its icy breath, freezing my face until my cheeks and mouth grew so stiff I couldn’t talk. I ran back inside and my cheeks began to sting in the warmth of my cozy house.

In this example, you are showing the character’s reaction to the snow and the cold. You could actually make it even more showing by having your character try to talk, but their words come out sounding strange, as they try to move their frozen jaws.

Another Show Don’t Tell rule is: Don’t tell the reader what to think.

Example: Pam is mad.

Example: Pam threw the roses in the garbage, then stuck her foot inside the trash can and stomped until the flowers looked more like pureed tomatoes than roses.

In the first example, you’re telling the reader that Pam is mad. In the second example, you are showing that Pam is mad. You don’t have to tell the reader that Pam is mad. They know she is mad! You showed how mad she was by her actions.

Telling = summarizing.

Showing = letting it play out in a scene.

Example of telling: Abigail was forced to ride home in the carriage with Mr. Turtletaub, who had a terrible cold but insisted on confessing his love for her and proposing marriage, even though she tried to stop him.

How would you show this? You would let the characters act it out in a scene. Show Mr. Turtletaub sneezing, his red nose, and then show him falling onto his knees. Use dialogue. Let the man speak his proposal to Abigail. Show Abigail’s reaction. Did she shrink away from him? Did she gasp? What did she say to try to stop him? If this is an interesting and important part of your plot, then you need to make it into a full-fledged scene.

Sometimes telling is okay. If the event is not worthy of its own scene, if it is not important to characterization or the plot, then it is okay to just tell what happened.

For example, you don’t want to make a scene out of two characters drinking tea and discussing the weather, then saying good-bye and going about their daily routine. That’s boring. Instead you can summarize that by saying, “Annie came by for a visit, but Abigail was careful not to mention that Mr. Turtletaub had proposed. Annie apparently hadn’t heard the news.” But all events that are significant to the plot need their own scenes, where you show the characters acting out their parts.

If you are wondering whether you should show a scene or just tell the reader in a short summary, ask yourself a few questions. Is this significant enough to be shown in a scene? Is it important to the plot? Does it move the story forward? Does it show characterization? If not, either leave it out completely, or summarize it in a sentence or two.

So much more could be said about showing and telling. It’s quite a big topic, but I hope this helps you at least get an idea of what it means to Show Don’t Tell.